Your fucking retinas called.

They want a goddamn apology.

Look at you, browsing at 2 AM like a degenerate.

You're sitting there in the dark, consuming content like the digital goblin you are, and some dickhead's website is blasting pure #FFFFFF directly into your skull like a flashbang from God himself.

You know what that is? That's assault, motherfucker.

Meanwhile, this genius made a perfect website with zero CSS. Then this other genius added 7 CSS declarations to make it readable. Then this absolute clown added a 15KB custom font, a cat picture, and JavaScript, while claiming to be "the best." They all left your corneas to fucking burn.

So here we are.

Zero. Fucking. CSS.

One meta tag.

That's it. That's the entire dark mode. I didn't write a single line of CSS. I didn't install a npm package. I didn't add a toggle animation. I didn't store your preference in a fucking blockchain. I added one HTML tag and the browser did the rest.

<meta name="color-scheme" content="dark">

Your move, motherfucker.

• Your eyes don't feel like they're staring into the sun
• Shit's even lighter than the original
• Shit's still readable
• You can browse at 3 AM without your spouse filing for divorce
• The motherfucker works everywhere that isn't Internet Explorer
• Even the fucking scrollbar is dark

The browser knew how to do this the whole time.

While you were writing 400 lines of CSS variables and creating a "ThemeProvider" context wrapper in React, the browser was sitting there like "bro I got you, just ask."

You produced JavaScript bundles. You created localStorage listeners. You made the page flash white for 0.3 seconds on every load. You debated HSL vs RGB for your color tokens. You added !important to override your own shit.

And the browser was just waiting. One tag. One fucking tag.

But wait, you absolute donkey.

I know what you're thinking. "But it doesn't look as polished! The colors aren't exactly what I want! The..."

Shut. The. Fuck. Up.

You know what users actually want? To not go blind. You know what time most people browse the web? When they should be sleeping. You know what every screen looks like in the dark? A fucking welding torch.

The browser's default dark mode is fine. It's better than your hand-crafted artisanal dark theme that took 3 sprints to implement and still has contrast issues.

"But the 'best' motherfucking website is already dark!" Yeah, it is. And it took them 63 kilobytes to get there. A 15KB custom font. A 28KB cat photo. CSS. JavaScript. A whole-ass jQuery dependency.

I did the same thing with 36 characters:

<meta name="color-scheme" content="dark">

They built a house. I flipped a light switch.

This is web development in 2025.

We produce complexity. We npm install our problems. We framework our way into 50MB node_modules folders. We can't center a div without a PhD in Flexbox.

And dark mode. Dark mode. Something the browser will literally do for free if you just fucking ask. We turned it into an engineering project.

You created eye strain because you refused to read the MDN docs.

The "best" motherfucking website loaded a cat picture.

Let that sink in.

Someone looked at motherfuckingwebsite.com, a monument to minimalism, and thought "you know what this needs? A 28KB cat picture. A custom font. JavaScript."

They wrote paragraphs about keeping things lightweight while loading 63KB of bullshit. They lectured about simplicity while importing Open Sans like a fucking amateur.

That's not "better." That's missing the point so hard it wrapped around and became satire of itself.

This website has a cat too:

    /\_/\  
   ( o.o ) 
    > ^ <
   /|   |\
  (_|   |_)
    

That's 60 bytes. Fuck your 28 kilobytes.

But wait, they said we need colors and animations!

Fine. Here's colored text without CSS. The <font> tag is deprecated, but it still fucking works. Just like your dad's jokes.

That's right. I just added animation and colors to a website with no CSS and no JavaScript. Meanwhile "the best" motherfucking website loaded jQuery to do... what exactly?

Let's talk file sizes.

They bragged about being "93.7% lighter than Google." This site is 89% lighter than them. Get fucked.

The absolute state of modern web development:

• 2015: "Let's add a dark mode toggle"
• 2017: "Let's use CSS variables for theming"
• 2019: "Let's detect system preference with JavaScript"
• 2021: "Let's use a React context provider with localStorage persistence"
• 2023: "Let's add Tailwind dark: variants to 847 components"
• 2025: One meta tag. It was always one meta tag.

This website respects you.

No CSS. No JavaScript. No toggle. No cookies. No localStorage. No consent banners asking permission to remember that you don't want to be flashbanged.

It's just dark. Like your soul. Like your humor. Like the bags under your eyes from browsing Reddit at 4 AM.

Yes, this is also fucking satire.

Mostly.

But seriously. We spent a decade turning a meta tag into a career. Dark mode was never a feature you had to build. It was always just sitting there in the MDN docs, waiting for someone to stop being clever.

Read the fucking docs.

"If your stylesheet is bigger than your HTML, you have fucked up."
- Ancient Sumerian proverb, circa 3500 BC

Inspired by motherfuckingwebsite.com (zero CSS, light mode), bettermotherfuckingwebsite.com (7 CSS declarations, still light mode), and thebestmotherfucking.website (dark mode, giant cat photo, 63KB of irony). Built with nothing but HTML and one meta tag that changes everything.

Why .xyz? Because .com wanted $10 and .xyz was $2. This website has zero CSS and I have zero budget. I'm not paying 5x markup for three letters. Frugality is a virtue.